Exploring the great disabled world
Exploring the great disabled world
People come to the oracle
This sterile void of redundant faith
Counting the years that go by
Trust tomorrow and rethink the threat
This is my "paste-pot" poem. Basically what we had to do was cut out a bunch of words from various magazines, particularly interesting words. Make sure you have a good amount of articles, so as to cover your ass in the event you need an article (though you could always go back and cut out some more words if you know what you're looking for). And then just start playing with the words you have. Instead of you writing the poem, the poem is supposed to write itself. I'd say my turned quite well, I'm satisfied with the end result. The last line was kind of tricky though, I almost put "pardon the explosion" instead of "rethink the threat," but it wouldn't have fit. I was also considering not including a fifth line at all, but then I found "rethink the threat" and thought it fit quite well.
I like Creative Writing already, 'tis a cool class. Plus there's this senior chick that sits by me that is into computers and stuff. We were comparing video cards :tongue: Her Radeon 9800 > my Radeon 9600. I said something about wanting to get a Mac Mini too, and she didn't like that. :tongue:
I work Friday and Saturday, both days from 6PM - 11PM. Thing is, however, mine and Brian's birthday party is on Saturday. It starts at 5, so I'm calling around trying to find ushers to take my Saturday shift. Should be fun... You know what else should be fun though? Early Saturday =P I called Megan last night, finally asked her what was going on and told her what Adam had said to Elyse. She seemed genuinely surprised. We talked about various things before she asked if I was doing anything on Sunday. 'Twas decided that Saturday would be a better day to do something, though, before she goes to work. What we're doing, however, we don't know. She had to work on her Physics homework that she had been putting off for way too long. So, yea! Awesomeness! I can't wait! :grin: It took me forever to pick up the damn phone. I was pacing from the family room, through the dining room, through the kitchen, and back through the family room. I picked it up once, listened to the dial-tone for thirty seconds and put the receiver back down. I paced for another ten or so minutes and finally picked it up. 5.... 5..... 5... 5.... 5.... 5............. ...... .... 5..... (555-5555, obviously not a real number) I told myself that if I didn't press that last number, when would I? When would I actually do this, if I couldn't do it now (or, at the time, anyway)? I asked myself if I wanted to hang up and go take my shower and beat myself up for being such a coward. I asked myself if it was really worth it to not do anything. I put my finger on that last digit and pressed, ever so slighty. [i]Come on! I can do this![/i] I pressed a little harder and heard that beep. [i]There you go! There's no turning back now![/i] I was so surprised I managed to do it. Awesome. When I got off the phone I wanted to freaking dance. Thing is, I DON'T dance. It's too embarassing :tongue: Though I did let myself dance a little in the shower. :tongue:
That nagging feeling
That nagging feeling, something tugging on your shirt;
You feel like you forgot something, but what?
A big school project? Nah, couldn't be;
Your homework, the night before?
Or maybe you forgot to tell someone something important?
What is that nagging feeling?
Oh wait, that's right;
I have a journal I haven't updated in forever.
OK, updates since the last real post... Unreal Tournament 2004 is awesome. I have not played a game this much and have downloaded mods and models and maps and such like this since back when I used to play Quake 2 on Dad's machine. Way back when. It's awesome. This game has so much potential. I have to check out UnrealED, gotta compare it to Radient (the map editor used for the various Quake engines and Doom 3). I've heard it's much easier, but when I launched it up, I had no clue how to make a simple brush. In Radient, it's just click and drag in one of the viewports and you have a brush. Adjust the height in the Z axis viewport, and hollow it out. Room! Right-mouse click, add a light and a spawn point; you're good to go! But what's really cool, and is very similar to what I've been wanting in Quake for a LONG time, is the fact that not EVERY modification falls under the category of mods. The mods are more like Total Conversions (where EVERYTHING in the game has been changed, gameplay, maps, whatever). I got this nifty mod called Alien Swarm. It reminds me of both Starcraft and Gauntlet at the same time. You have an overhead view and you control up to four marines. You can switch between the marines using the 1,2,3, or 4 keys. Your mouse is used to aim the currently selected marine and fire if there's a baddie nearby. Your goal in the levels vary, but the one level I played that wasn't a training level had you go through this (abandoned?) spaceship and destroy these eggs. There were bugs all over the place. It was awesome and very imaginative (read: NOT what I expected a mod to an FPS game to be like).
Alright, good example of mods. Next comes gametypes. You know, the usual CTF, DM, TDM, Bombing Run, Assault, Invasion, Domination, and Onslaught (the included gametypes). I'm sure some of you remember the JailBreak mod for Quake 2? Essentially, it was TDM, but when someone died, they were sent to the appropriate jail, usually in the enemy's base. Here they had to wait until their teammates helped them escape or were all killed. Sometimes, in some maps, if there were multiple jailmates, one could hop on top of the other and escape through a small passage and free the rest of them, but it was very hard to pulloff. JailBreakQ2 was a mod. JailBreak2004 is a gametype. That's right. It can be used in conjunction with mods if they support non-official (official to the game or official to the mod) gametypes. Another gametype I downloaded is called 2D Tournament. Essentially, it makes UT a sidescrolling game. I doubt it would work well with regular maps, but it has maps designed specifically for the gametype. There are also maps from Mega Man (NES) and two Mario (NES) levels. Pretty neat.
And last, are the mutators. Mutators are minor modifications to the game. They don't change gameplay, they don't change everything imaginable. They do... tweaks I guess you could say. One such mutator is the Santa Hat mutator. It adds santa hats to all characters in the game. There's also one that replaces the nodes in Onslaught mode with wreaths and Christmas trees. Many mutators come with the game, but there are a LOT more downloadable from the web. There's one I got that makes the Karma physics engine apply to pick-upable items (health, ammo, guns, etc.), so you can shoot the health around just like you would a dead body! Another one, and my personal favorite right now, adds BULLET TIME to the game. It slows down the game when you hold down the proper key and allows you to aim at nearly the same speed. It also makes your jumps faster and you're in the air for much longer than you would be normally. I actually have three bullet time mutators, only one of them works. I've downloaded some mutators that totally replace every single gun in the game. I've downloaded others that attempt to make the game Halo (replace vehicles, replace weapons, etc. with those from Halo), part of the "beta" release of ProjectTorlan, or HaloUT. And I have another that adds a whole RPG thing to the game (leveling up, skill points, attributes, skills, etc.). It's AMAZING what can be done with this game! The thing is, what category (mod, gametype, mutator) would the SuperHeroes mod would fall under?
Alright, now that I've explained some of the awesomeness of UT2k4, let's move on! Oh wait, I forgot to mention: UT2k4 supports Linux out of the box. The back of the box has a Tux icon, and the Install disc has a "linux-installer.sh" Glee! Now I just need to get that Geforce 6600 GT so I can actually game in Linux.
I worked every other day during Christmas break. Starting with Christmas eve, then Sunday, then Tueday, then Thurday, then I worked both Friday and Saturday. Sunday through Thurday where very... uneventful. Friday was slightly different. I talked to Ms. Haynes (the current Web Page Development teacher, she subbed for us quite a bit last year) about doing the school website next semester. I am officially doing it, now! Dropped astronomy, added Independent Study in the Business Department. The only good thing that really happened at school. Everything else was the same old crap. At work that night, I was down in C Section. Megan was down there too. She actually helped us out quite a bit during the 9 o' clock set (she's a concessionist, remember? They don't do cleans unless we really need them to help). While in thater 22, she said something about me being awesome, then Kevin (the new Kevin) agreed. Somehow my "fanclub" got brought up (On New Year's Eve Jason, Andrew, Meaghan, and Heather were at the theater. Somehow they were talking to Megan and they formed a fanclub for me, or something like that...). She said I was cooler than anyone else, more so than Adam, Nate, all of those people. "Cooler than Adam? Your boyfriend?" "He's not my boyfriend." "$lastname" "Nope. I'm single. You should go out with me!" "What?" "Say yes!" Kevin joined in on the "say yes" thing as well. It was.. different, to say the least. I was really surprised, but I dunno if she meant it or not... Hm..
Tony is in possession of the ball! Your move, Tony!
And if you read all of this, you deserve a cookie. But you're not getting any of mine.
So close, yet so far
There you are, so close, yet so far;
I look into your eyes, you look into mine,
we smile at each other, for a bit;
I look away, quickly, ashamed and embarrased,
looking back only to find you still smiling at me;
So close, yet so far;
We've started talking more, these past few months;
We've started laughing more, these past few months;
I look into your eyes, hoping to find something,
something that I can grab onto,
something that I can use,
something that will help me say what I want to;
You look back at me, smiling;
All I can do is smile, and look around;
If I reached out to you, would you reach out to me?
If I asked you, would you?
So close, yet so far;
I look into your eyes, you look into mine;
We smile at each other for a bit,
I look away, quickly, ashamed and embarrased,
looking back only to find you still smiling at me;
So close,
yet so far;
A Random Poem
Everynight I lay awake,
thinking, dreaming of what could have been mine;
Everynight I lay awake,
wondering what could have been;
It is too late now,
for the object of my desires has been taken;
There is nothing I can do now but
forget about that which I wanted;
Give up and move on I must,
but it is so hard;
Everynight I lay awake,
wondering what could have been.
It's weird, most of my poems come to me while I'm laying in bed trying to sleep. If I'm lucky enough to remember them in the morning, I end up not remembering all of what (at the time) seemed like a great poem. This one is a good example: I had a great ending for it sometime last night. But after waking up and typing this out, I forgot what the ending should have been and was, instead, forced to come up with another, not so great ending. Meh, oh well...
Hunt the Metaphor!
Wrote this one in the car on one of the many car rides we went on while Up North:
Tattered and torn,
like discarded trash, I feel;
Carelessly tossed out a car window,
on some old, country, back road;
Left alone, alone and forgotten,
alone on this road, left to the wind's bidding;
Maybe, eventually, some kind soul will pick me up,
carry me along with them for a while;
Before finally letting down easily,
in a nice trash can.
Interpret as you will.